As parents you are not meant to put your kids in the ground. We kids do not look forward to one day having to lay our parents to rest but it is expected.
This is one of the reasons I never had kids. I was never courageous enough to take the risk of having and then possibly losing a kid too early. You are a very courageous man for taking that leap of faith, as all fathers are.
John, I don't know you and I am new to the board - I don't have kids and probably never will. But I want to thank you for sharing this very personal event in your life. I want to thank you for trusting the folks in the board to be there for you to lean on. It takes a lot of courage to share such pain in such a public way; we never really know what types of reactions, comments, or conversations might ensue.
I am sitting here reading through your post and sobbing - not for your son though I hope he has found peace. I hurt for you and your grandson...and I am angry right now. I am SOOO MAD! This is so unfair that such things happen to such good people that so many love and cherish and look up to. I mean, look at the outpouring from the board, right?
You need time for yourself to grieve and hurt and be angry and be confused and a thousand other emotions but you also need to be a rock for your family, your grandson. I don't know how you do that short of putting one foot in front of the other. Taking that first step trying to find some way to navigate this hole that has been created in front of you while you have family you are supporting on your shoulders, holding your hands, crying on your chest...
This will hurt forever and the hole your son left will never be filled and that just sucks. The pictures are great - thank you for sharing them. Your son looked like a pretty cool kid.
I will say prayer for you and your family and keep you in my thoughts.
