Samplingman
Old Man with a Hat
And the car's not bad either:
http://portland.craigslist.org/mlt/cto/4882939172.html
So here's the deal, due to newly formulating circumstances I am being strong armed by my ol' lady to part ways with the other love of my life, because "Apparently" a 1977 Chrysler Córdoba doesn't rate high on the "baby-friendly" spectrum of car safety. Pffff. what a load of crap. What you're looking at right here is 3,700 pounds of red blooded American steel. Now Answer me this: if you get in a head-on collision, Would you feel more comfortable having you're loved ones sitting in the cab of some fruity little aluminum Jetta or Accord? Or are you gonna place your faith in the M1 Abram tank-like engineering of this USofA panty dropper with sexy curves like a stripper, and a hood spanning 8 feet long, which not only gives you that extra safety buffer between you and the Almighty as you're plowing through some poor bastard in a Honda, but also houses the erection-inducing V8 400 big block engine. Yeah, thought so. Although i think this magnificent pimp wagon originally came standard with a pair of prostitutes, I can only imagine that they have long since retired since the 70's. But in the wake of their absence, who's to stop you from carrying on the tradition and starting your own stables, eh? Because when you're rolling down the road in this well maintained, two ton Viagra-on-wheels, heads will turn, and people will notice. It's reminiscent of a time when men were men, and real men drove cars like this.
Even though the original 8track player is spotty when I try to play my Commodores tracks, the new, professionally installed $1100 stereo makes up for that little inadequacy. In order to keep this baby purring, she's also got a brand new radiator, upper and lower hoses, muffler, spark plugs, starter, brakes and water pump, just had rear dif work done, an overhauled carburetor, and all sorts of other auto mechanical nonsense that apparently rates charging me thousands of dollars.
Once you're ridin dirty in this sexy beast, you should know that as of now, the passenger window doesn't work, the wiring for the front dash is being a pain in the *** (which is an easy and cheap fix, I just don't wanna do it), and the AC doesn't work... but c'mon, you live in Oregon. If it actually gets that hot, just roll down the window (driver side, of course) and you're golden like a shower. Oh, also, since people drive like assholes, I may have been a bit over enthusiastic when slamming on the horn once, twice or a whole bunch of times, which sorta got the horn "stuck" in the "BRAAAAAAAAAAH" position. That was a super awkward drive home on the I-5. But eff 'em if they can't take a joke, am I right? So I unplugged that little nuisance. Again easy fix, just don't wanna do it.
You'll have to get new plates to replace my veteran ones, unless you're a hard charging agent of death like myself, in which case you're good to go. But that should also give you solace, since you can rest assured that the last three times I was off jet setting around the world fighting wars and stuff like an under paid Batman, this beauty sat covered or in a garage.
This is my baby (aside form that other baby, which is the reason for this post). She was my daily driver, and continues to be until someone pries her from me. She drives beautifully; imagine riding a couch down the street... If that couch was fueled by testosterone and sex appeal. So be warned: try to lowball me, or make some ridiculous, insulting offer, and my wrath will ensue. I've got every piece of documentation, including title, and proof that she passes DEQ, and all receipts on work done to the car dating back to 1977 when it was purchased, which I obtained from the original owner, and I've kept my receipts as well. So go ahead, grab your fur coat, cane, and your flock of bitches, and gimme a call to set up a meeting.
By the way, if you're the WMD-Bag who flagged my post, take your hatred of America elsewhere. Cuz here in the home of the brave, we're all chalk-full of awesome and don't need you're brand of negativity. Boom! (mic drop)
http://portland.craigslist.org/mlt/cto/4882939172.html
So here's the deal, due to newly formulating circumstances I am being strong armed by my ol' lady to part ways with the other love of my life, because "Apparently" a 1977 Chrysler Córdoba doesn't rate high on the "baby-friendly" spectrum of car safety. Pffff. what a load of crap. What you're looking at right here is 3,700 pounds of red blooded American steel. Now Answer me this: if you get in a head-on collision, Would you feel more comfortable having you're loved ones sitting in the cab of some fruity little aluminum Jetta or Accord? Or are you gonna place your faith in the M1 Abram tank-like engineering of this USofA panty dropper with sexy curves like a stripper, and a hood spanning 8 feet long, which not only gives you that extra safety buffer between you and the Almighty as you're plowing through some poor bastard in a Honda, but also houses the erection-inducing V8 400 big block engine. Yeah, thought so. Although i think this magnificent pimp wagon originally came standard with a pair of prostitutes, I can only imagine that they have long since retired since the 70's. But in the wake of their absence, who's to stop you from carrying on the tradition and starting your own stables, eh? Because when you're rolling down the road in this well maintained, two ton Viagra-on-wheels, heads will turn, and people will notice. It's reminiscent of a time when men were men, and real men drove cars like this.
Even though the original 8track player is spotty when I try to play my Commodores tracks, the new, professionally installed $1100 stereo makes up for that little inadequacy. In order to keep this baby purring, she's also got a brand new radiator, upper and lower hoses, muffler, spark plugs, starter, brakes and water pump, just had rear dif work done, an overhauled carburetor, and all sorts of other auto mechanical nonsense that apparently rates charging me thousands of dollars.
Once you're ridin dirty in this sexy beast, you should know that as of now, the passenger window doesn't work, the wiring for the front dash is being a pain in the *** (which is an easy and cheap fix, I just don't wanna do it), and the AC doesn't work... but c'mon, you live in Oregon. If it actually gets that hot, just roll down the window (driver side, of course) and you're golden like a shower. Oh, also, since people drive like assholes, I may have been a bit over enthusiastic when slamming on the horn once, twice or a whole bunch of times, which sorta got the horn "stuck" in the "BRAAAAAAAAAAH" position. That was a super awkward drive home on the I-5. But eff 'em if they can't take a joke, am I right? So I unplugged that little nuisance. Again easy fix, just don't wanna do it.
You'll have to get new plates to replace my veteran ones, unless you're a hard charging agent of death like myself, in which case you're good to go. But that should also give you solace, since you can rest assured that the last three times I was off jet setting around the world fighting wars and stuff like an under paid Batman, this beauty sat covered or in a garage.
This is my baby (aside form that other baby, which is the reason for this post). She was my daily driver, and continues to be until someone pries her from me. She drives beautifully; imagine riding a couch down the street... If that couch was fueled by testosterone and sex appeal. So be warned: try to lowball me, or make some ridiculous, insulting offer, and my wrath will ensue. I've got every piece of documentation, including title, and proof that she passes DEQ, and all receipts on work done to the car dating back to 1977 when it was purchased, which I obtained from the original owner, and I've kept my receipts as well. So go ahead, grab your fur coat, cane, and your flock of bitches, and gimme a call to set up a meeting.
By the way, if you're the WMD-Bag who flagged my post, take your hatred of America elsewhere. Cuz here in the home of the brave, we're all chalk-full of awesome and don't need you're brand of negativity. Boom! (mic drop)
